The Spartan Initiative

What Domestic Violence Professionals Won’t Say About Men

a person forming a fist with threat

Domestic violence does not discriminate. While most victims are women, male DV victims are often left out of the conversation entirely. While some men do think hurting female partners makes them strong, others do not believe the same and do not have violent bones in their bodies.

Since the death of water polo coach Lili James, domestic violence professionals have said that men need to be taught at a young age that women are not props for them to parade around and abuse behind closed doors. However, this is a sexist matter of thinking.

Men need to change their behaviours? Yes, some do, but what about women who hide behind their gender to get what they want? Again, not all women are like this, either. It is just a select few who believe they are entitled.

Sydney Watson, an Australian social commentator, published a video on her YouTube Channel four years ago where she spoke about how sexist it was for the Australian government to insinuate that men can’t be domestic violence victims. 

Sexist Domestic Violence Ads That Discriminate Against Men

She also broke down the sexist nature of two ads that had been created at the time for the Respect campaign, which fights for female domestic violence. As Sydney points out in her video, the campaign uses language like, “He’s just being a boy” and uses a little girl to pull her father and brother up on their sexist attitude when they complain about the brother’s suspicion from school being because he flicked up a girl’s skirt.

The little girl in the ad with the sexist father and brother raises a good point. Because she is female, she should be used to being abused by men because of her gender. The father realises his words are wrong and gives a non-apology of “That’s not what I went.”

The second ad with the “he’s just being a boy” line is just as bad as it’s a woman saying the quote, insinuating that all men are violent psychopaths who all hate women.

Very Little Has Changed In Almost Five Years, Domestic Violence Still Doesn’t Discriminate

What’s infuriating is the message hasn’t changed in almost five years. Domestic violence professionals are refusing to change the narrative that not all men are misogynistic and violent. Sure, the stats for male domestic violence are nowhere near as high as the statistics for women. But that doesn’t mean it’s not happening.

The Man Who Was Burned Alive By His Wife

For example, there was a woman who burned her husband to death in Victoria in 2020. The couple had been arguing. The wife had doused her victim in petrol while he was sitting in his armchair. He said “she didn’t have the stomach” to make him burn. Yet, she did just that, with almost the entire room in smoke. Their young children watched television in the other room when the situation worsened. She was sentenced in 2022 to 12 years in prison and will be eligible for parole in 2028.

The Woman Who Fed er Partner To His Children

Another example of a woman killing a male partner was Katherine Knight, who killed her partner, John Price, in 2000. She cut his body up and tried to feed his body parts to his children. There are many other cases like this that date back to the 1800s when domestic violence wasn’t even something that was known.

It’s upsetting that domestic violence experts don’t even attempt to correct the narrative that domestic violence can affect anyone and that it doesn’t discriminate. Not just women. Not just children but even men. There’s a reason it is classified as family violence.

In conclusion, domestic violence campaigners need to take a better look at the statistics and see that women can be perpetrators, too. Those who offend should be taught that just because they’re women doesn’t mean they can get off with committing a significant crime.

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About Author

C.J. Hawkings has written for the now-defunct Entertainment website, Movie Pilot and the still functioning WhatCulture and ScreenRant. She prides herself as a truth seeker and will do (almost) anything for coffee or Coke No Sugar. Oh! And food!