Chronicles of Harkle

Meghan Markle’s First American Riviera Orchard Product Is Tacky – OPINION

Meghan Markle thought that her new brand, American Riviera Orchard (ARO), needed an original product, jam. Oh, yes she thinks her ARO jam is original. Two of her rich friends, Tracy Robbins (the wife of Paramount CEO Brian Robbins) and Delfina (Nacho’s wife) posted to their Instagram stories the 10th and 17th of a batch of 50… wait for it, strawberry jam jars.

I wish I could make that up. What makes Meghan Markle’s ARO jam stand out from all the other jams on the market? Oh! Right. It was made by the Duchess of Sussex in Montecito, California.

I had a couple of thoughts about this.

Could Meghan Be Reselling Flamingo Estate Products?

Firstly, what are the odds that Meghan bought a ton of old products from Flamingo Estate and then started flogging it as her own just with new labels? It would not be surprising. This would be like the banana bread with chocolate chips fiasco all over again. I’ll go over that in a different post.

Now, speaking of Flamingo Estate, the reason they are successful is due to the twists they put on their products. For example, they have a spicy strawberry snack, which has key lime and rock salt. That is what I call a twist. What is special about Meghan’s ARO strawberry jam? Nothing as far as I can tell.

Was there chilli for a kick? We don’t know. Outside of the Montecito and Meghan thing, what makes the ARO jam unique?

Why Didn’t Meghan Put The Product Out To The Public?

Moving on from that, why didn’t Meghan distribute the product to the public? Did she get clearance from health services? Knowing Meghan, she didn’t seek approval for anything. So, this makes me wonder. Why 50 people? Does she know that many people who she has not ghosted or bullied? Did she think about whether the people she was giving the jam to were allergic?

Also, why did Tracy get lemons and Delfina didn’t? Is Meghan trying to befriend Tracy so that she will get Brian’s good side?

Who Could Have Gotten The ARO Jam?

Let’s try to work out who these fifty people are, shall we? We won’t list them in numbered order. Also, this is just a guess.

  1. Oprah
  2. Gayle King
  3. Abigail Spencer
  4. Silver Tree
  5. Delfina (Nacho’s wife)
  6. Ellen Degeneres
  7. Portia De Rossi
  8. Tracy Robbins
  9. Lucy (friend seen in Netflix docuseries)
  10. Lindsay Jill Roth (college friend)
  11. Serena Williams
  12. Doria (Meghan’s mother)
  13. Kim Kardashian
  14. Kris Jenner
  15. Ashleigh (Meghan’s niece)
  16. Mindy Kaling
  17. Misha Nonoo
  18. Jameela Jamil
  19. Markus Anderson
  20. Daniel Martin
  21. Christopher Bouzy
  22. James Holt
  23. Margaret Cho
  24. Mandana Dayani
  25. Katie Couric
  26. Brooke Shields

Okay, these were the only ones I can think of. I was going to include Princess Eugenie, but I thought better of it as she lives in England, and her relationship with the Sussexes now is questionable.

Any lackey of Meghan, no matter how minor will get some of that jam.

From what Delfina posted to her Instagram stories, the ARO strawberry jam looks like generic jam that you’d buy at the supermarket or the farmer’s market. Meghan could have launched a unique product like almond butter or a twist on orange marmalade.

Finally, Meghan has no original thoughts in her head whatsoever. She wants people to think she came up with the concept when jam has existed for hundreds of years.

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About Author

C.J. Hawkings has written for the now-defunct Entertainment website, Movie Pilot and the still functioning WhatCulture and ScreenRant. She prides herself as a truth seeker and will do (almost) anything for coffee or Coke No Sugar. Oh! And food!

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